Does Metaphysics Matter? Part One: "Not really, no"

Years ago in Busan, South Korea, I was in bed when my girlfriend, in what I believe to be an attempt to share interests with each other, asked me what exactly someone studies when they study metaphysics.  I considered giving her the definition my professor had offered my class years and years ago on the first day of my first metaphysics course — “Metaphysics is the study of being qua being” — but I refrained from doing so because most people quickly lose interest after hearing that sentence spoken aloud.  Instead I opted for a metaphysical topic often used early on in any philosophy department’s curriculum, that of Universals and Particulars.  “It’s like, um, we know that there are green things,” I explained, “but, like, is green actually a thing?” (I’m usually more eloquent, but we were both fairly stoned at this point.)  She responded by bluntly telling me that was the most useless thing she had ever heard of before rolling over and going to sleep.

Almost a year later to the day I was having a similar conversation in a bar in Athens, Georgia talking to a guy that had recently received his PhD in physics.  He asked me to define my terms, as educated people interested in understanding something often do, and this time I decided to use the second definition of metaphysics I had been given on the first day of class.  “My old professor used to say ‘Metaphysics is the study of the way things are,” I told him, “and physics is the study of the way things appear to be.”  My fellow bar fly gave this two seconds of thought and responded with “Well, I’d say physics is the study of the ways things are, and metaphysics is the study of nothing, because it’s pointless.”

I forgave him for his brusque reply.  If you walk into a book store like Barnes & Noble and head to the metaphysics section, you’ll find a lot of ridiculous shit being offered as fact because I don’t think Barnes & Noble understand what “metaphysics” is anymore than the average schmuck (a fairly thorough definition can be found on Wikipedia). And physicists are especially sensitive to the sort of woo-woo bullshit that uses physics terms to explain phenomena that is questionable at best.  If you’re feeling especially cruel, find a physicist at a party (that part may be difficult) and start misusing the word “energy.”  You can watch his face go all stony as he performs several mental calculations in an attempt to figure out how much anger it would be appropriate to reveal in a social setting.  My own face makes a similar expression whenever a hippy starts talking about earth-worship and the “soul of the planet,” but since nobody cares about an occultist’s opinions I keep quiet and drink until I don’t care anymore...


Read more: http://disinfo.com/2015/02/metaphysics-matter-part-1-not-really-no/